Hello Ladies and Gentlemen,
There are a lot of articles about what women want. This can be confusing to men as they aren't sure how to act or proceed in the current dating market. I've seen this over the years as younger guys who try to flirt tend to be quiet, unsure of themselves, afraid of rejection, and have no clue. The older generations of guys tend to be more confident, have a better understanding of what to say, and take rejection well. You can blame internet, or no strong male role model but this can be changed. So this is more for the men but women should read as well so they can see if this fits them. Having a better understanding of what you want can prevent the laundry list of qualities that you find out later aren't needed to find a man. This excludes the obvious, no cheating and no abusing.
Protection: I can not express this enough. It's instinctual. Women want to feel like they are safe. They want a first line defender for their family. If a women says no, she's not looking for this, she is either lying to herself or she has taken on the masculine role and wants to be the protector. In a time where crimes have escalated, women are starting to realize how important protection is. I'm not here to debate the crime rate either, or the reason why it's going up. For women, this is why some tend to fall for the bad boys. They give off a false feel of protection. How? They tend to be the ones who are willing to start fights. This creates a false sense of "He can fight, he'll protect me" Sorry ladies but these men are missing one important skill. De escalation. So men, you may ask, "How do I make this happen?" Learn self defense and de escalation. Take classes. One it'll make you feel better and keep your body fit while teaching you how to protect your family. Men that have these skills act differently in public. They hold themselves straighter, don't have a fear of situations and will be more aware of their surroundings. Is this always the case? No, there will always be idiots who just want to cause problems. Again if you have the skills, you'll know when you can walk away and when to take action.
Standing your ground: I know, I know. The exact opposite of what every women says. Sorry but it's the truth. A women doesn't want a man to bend to her will. Why? Because if you can bend to her will, who else will you bend to? Again, men are the first line defense. If you bend too easily, women will see someone easy to manipulate. This becomes a problem because they not only loose respect for you, but trust. You'll suddenly see a change, almost immediately. She'll start asking you to prove yourself, over and over. "Send me a snapchat of you at your friend's place. It's 8:05 pm, why weren't you home at 8pm? Who were you speaking to? Why is that girl talking to you?" When asked a woman will say, "I just want to approve of your decisions or actions." and bring up past relationships. The truth? She doesn't trust you. So learn to stand your ground. That does not mean be a jerk. But don't be afraid of her yelling. If she yells at you for being two minutes past the exact time, or wants you to prove yourself innocent, don't take it. Tell her if she doesn't like it, she can leave. This will leave her speechless because you aren't fighting for her approval. She's not your mom. You don't need her approval and micromanagement. This again, doesn't mean go gamble your future away. There are times when a women will be mad and has a right to be upset. This will be tied to big risks that affect safety or financial security of the family. There will also be times where she seems angry but it's more fear. So you left work later and got stuck in a storm while she's at home worried. You get home and she yells, it's more often she was fearful for you than actually angry. So men, stand your ground. Don't let her fuss, nag and yell over stupid, little things. Otherwise she'll try to control you and neither of you will be happy.
Purpose: I'm sure if you are a man reading this, you've heard this before. Women tend to call this determination or strive to better themselves as men. What this means? Find something you love or are good at as a career. Find a goal. Where do you want to be in ten years? Where do you have to be in 5 years to make that 10 year goal? What steps do you take now to make that happen? Find a goal or career that you love or want and go for it. Women like men who can lead them. You can't lead if you are going through life without a plan or goal. Women will disagree, because the culture demands it. But they are also sleeping with the men who do have their goal or purpose. If this means you need to forget dating for a bit while you work various jobs to find out what you want in life than take that time. You don't need a relationship to be happy. Find fulfillment in your life first. Trust me, women will still be there even when you are 30-40 years old.
Problem solver: This is very important. Despite what women say, they want a man with the solutions. They want a man who sees a problem and finds a way, even if it's out of the box, to solve it. This is again a part of a man leading. They don't mind helping but I can guarantee you, they don't want to do it all the time. If they do, they will be more in touch with their masculine side. This is also important for men to know anyway. They should be pushing to solve their problems. Why? So much is stacked against men in this day and age. This may mean take a few risks, calculated of course. For instance, risk of buying a home. Yes there is the risk of the furnace going and now you need to fix it out of pocket. Yet buying a home is an investment that appreciates if done correctly. Stocks are not a sure way to save. You could loose all your money. You could also increase the amount you put in, especially through dividends. So become a problem solver.
Don't treat her like a goddess: Do not do this. She is not a goddess. She can not grant your wishes with the snap of her fingers. Women are harder on themselves and other women than you realize. Most women realize they are not a goddess, and if they really believe they are, you don't really want them. Keep in mind all the Greek goddess legends men. How many of them were faithful to their mates? So don't worship her, otherwise she'll rule over you. No need to take her out every weekend. No need to get her a dozen roses as a surprise at her office. She is human. So treat her like a female human not someone above you. Even the women who say they are queens want a king to lead them.
Do not compliment her while trying to get her to see her mistake: So many men do this and have no idea the impact. Say she spent way too much money on a new bag. You had to take money out of savings to cover it. Stand your ground, because this is not okay. But do not compliment her while doing it. For instance, "Yes the bag looks great on you, but we had to take money out of our savings." Or we can look at a response if a women says she's fat, " I think you are beautiful no matter what, but you could tone up a bit." Once she hears that compliment, she'll ignore everything you just said. Trust me, I'm a woman. It's a common fault of ours. You may be asking, "I don't know a guy who does this." Yes you do, and you may have done it yourself. The last thing men want to do is put down women. So they try to make the truth easier to hear either to not put them down, or because they don't women to jump to defending herself. "But I got it at a discount! It's normally 875$ and I got it for 300$" Sound familiar? So to avoid this, don't sugar coat. She fucked up, I guarantee you, she won't sugar coat for you. So men stop complimenting women when there is an issue, stop sugar coating. She will literally ignore everything else you said and focus only on the compliment or jump to defending herself because she senses weakness.
Do not, at any time, give up something good in your life for her: Do not give up your career, or purpose for hers. Do not give up Good influences or people in your life for her. Do not give up your hobbies for her. You will loose her respect so fast your head will be spinning. If you wouldn't do it for yourself, don't do it for her. Now if you have a friend who is always taking money and never seems available to you when you need and she mentions it, that's different. Again, stand your ground. If she says someone is a bad influence or doesn't care about you as much as you do, evaluate it. If you can't find any evidence in their actions, then she is trying to control you.
The rest depends on situation and the type of woman you are interested in. This is just suggestions and if you are a guy, I suggest you go to YouTube as well. Get some input from other men. In reality, men shouldn't take advice from women, because women can't be trusted. I'm writing this as a mom and this is what I would tell my boys. Although my hope is the dating market changes for the better by then. So I hope this helped and as always, Take hold of your own future.
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